Serena Williams is expecting
a little baby, yo! -Yeah!
-(cheering, applause) Congratulations, Serena. Although I must admit
I was a little disappointed to find out she was pregnant when she won the Australian
Open, which is not cool because, technically,
that’s a doubles match. Cheating. I’m just
gonna put it out there. And, uh, you know
what they say– for every amazing black baby
that comes into the world, one old white man has to leave. We have some breaking news
to report to you. Fox news anchor Bill O’Reilly will not be returning
toThe O’Reilly Factor.REPORTER:Parent company
20th Century Foxsays it came to the decision
after a reviewof the allegations of sexual
harassment and verbal abusecoming by the host.
Of course he settleda lot of lawsuits.
No word yet what will happento his show,
The O’Reilly Factor.One would assume
the name changes.Or… or they just keep the show and they just
find a random Irish guy with the same last name.
You know? Just like,
“It’s me, Steve O’Reilly. Tonight’s top story:
Bono– that’s not a real name!” Because, I mean, we assume
that they’ll change the name of the show, but we also assumed
that Fox would have fired O’Reilly
after the third time he was accused of sexual
harassment, so you never know. Uh, and now,
here atThe Daily Show,we want to give O’Reilly
the sendoff that he deserves. Because, let’s be honest,
he’s not gonna get it on Fox, that’s for sure, you know?
Those guys are probably gonna pretend nothing is wrong.
Just be like, “No news to report here.
Everything is fine. “Back to you, Megyn. “I mean Greta. “I mean Gretchen. “I mean Bill. I mean, who’s left?” (cheering, applause) So… so let’s give Bill
his proper due, because you may not know this,
but Bill O’Reilly was the biggest figure
in the history of cable news. At one point
no one even came close. Because they were afraid that
he might sexually harass them. His prime time show was the top
cable news show for 16 years with as many as four million
viewers a night. But before O’Reilly
was a huge star on Fox News he was blowing up
onInside Edition,as, uh, shown
in this infamous clip. I don’t know what that means–
“to play us out.” What does that mean? -To end the show?
-DIRECTOR: Yeah, yeah. That’s tomorrow.
And that is it for us today, and we will leave you with a… -I-I can’t do it.
-DIRECTOR: Okay. -We’ll do it live.
-Okay. -Well, no…
-We’ll do it live! (bleep) it! Do it live. I can… I’ll write it
and we’ll do it live! (bleep) thing sucks! Wow. Wow. All of that just because
Bill O’Reilly had never heard the expression
“play us out”? That is the angriest
I’ve ever seen someone get from not knowing a phrase.
Like, for instance, in America, I hear phrases
I don’t understand all the time,
but I don’t flip out over it. You don’t see me going,
“My neck of the woods? “Wh-What neck, what woods?
Woods don’t have necks! “It doesn’t make sense!
It doesn’t (bleep) make… “(yelling) (bleep) it, I’ll do it live!” -Now…
-(cheering, applause) Now, some of us watch that clip
and we see madness. But in the mid-’90s a man
by the name of Roger Ailes watched it,
and he saw greatness. And he reached out and said, “Come join me at Fox,
O’Reilly, and together “we will build a cable empire fueled by white Christian
resentment. “And then, as our masterstroke, “we will both be forced to leave “because we couldn’t
keep our penises “in our white Christian pants. Allegedly.” And so O’Reilly went forth and gave voice to that vision. If you’re a Christian
or a white man in the USA, it’s open season on you. There is a war between
traditional Americans and secular progressives
in this country. The left sees white privilege in
America as an oppressive force that must be done away with. Taking voting power
away from the white precincts is the quickest way to do that.The New York Timesof the world hate the white Christian
male power structure, and want to change it by a massive amount
of foreign nationals being able to vote.The way we’ve lived
for the past 250 yearsare under siege.Christmas has become
controversial in America. The war on Christmas begins. -The war on Christmas.
-…this war on Christmas. ♪ We wish you
a Merry Christmas. ♪ So-called white privilege: bad. Diversity: good. Okay… here’s what I don’t understand: if white people
don’t have it good in the U.S., then which race does? Because it’s not black people, it’s not Hispanics,
it’s not Asians. I mean, that pretty much leaves whatever mystery race
Bruno Mars is. So who’s having a good time? So, yes, Bill O’Reilly talked
about a lot of issues over 20 years. But it’s important tonight
to remember that he had a special place
in his heart for black people, prison. Don’t get pregnant at 14. Don’t allow your neighborhoods
to deteriorate into free-fire zones. That’s what
the African-American community should have on their T-shirts. …with African-American youth. But how are you gonna get jobs
for them? Many of them are ill-educated and have tattoos
on their foreheads. There’s an outreach– I don’t
even know what that means– -by the Obama administration
to African-Americans. -Yeah. I don’t…
What does that entail? Are they gonna be onSoul Train?You always refuse to acknowledge
that there is -institutional racism
in this country -Okay, because -and that there’s a legacy
-you can’t prove it, Powers. -of racism in this country.
-You can’t prove it. Slaves did participate in the
construction of the White House. Slaves that worked there
were well-fed and had decent lodgings
provided by the government. Say you’re a cocaine dealer–
and you kind of look like one a little bit… (laughter, groaning) Man, can I just say,
Bill O’Reilly’s lucky that black people aren’t all the
criminals he thinks they are. Otherwise, that guy would have
popped a cap in his ass. He would have bust a cap
in his ass so fast! (cheering and applause) But, no, he had to go and be a highly educated
college professor. Boring. You know, looking back on all
of O’Reilly’s greatest hits, the one thing
that’s hard to believe was that it took this long
for him to lose his job. That’s what I always wonder. And, like,
why did all the advertisers that pulled off his show now
stick with the show that long? Like, what,
were they watching that like, “You know what, he does look
like a cocaine dealer, yeah. Buy Reddi-wip.” But-but maybe, maybe the reason
Fox kept O’Reilly on for so long was because sometimes
he was so racist it somehow became funny. O’REILLY: -MAN: Please, and if…
-O’REILLY: You know? I mean… -(laughter, murmuring)
-You… you know, guys,
this is so racist, I can’t even be mad about it. Because you realize,
in Bill O’Reilly’s mind, going to a black restaurant
was basically going to be like walking into the middle
of the Rodney King riots. Like, he thought people
wouldn’t be ordering food– they just loot the kitchen
and run out with their order. You know, the waiters
would be doing drive-bys. “You want some ketchup,
(bleep)?!” (mimicking shots) “Get some pepper, yo.” (cheering and applause) What do you think? And-and Bill O’Reilly
wasn’t just a famous newsman. You know all that anger
and victimhood you hear from Trump voters? A lot of that started with him. Like, a lot of people said that Jon Stewart was the Yoda
of cable news. Well, Bill O’Reilly
was the Sith Lord. And I want to be Daisy Ridley.
Can I be Daisy Ridley? Please?
I want to be Daisy Rid… (mimicking lightsaber) I think I nailed it. And you know what they say
about the Sith– there is much anger
on the dark side. You’re either gonna stop talking
or I’m gonna cut your mike off. -Cut his mike. -Cut his mike.
-Cut her mike off. -Want to know what I was doing?
-Shut up. Shut up. You don’t know anything. He doesn’t have a right
to be in this country! -Not entitlements! One program!
-Why are you yelling? -What do you want to yell for?
-Bull… Because you’re lying! Hold on. None of this was
your fault! Oh, no! -People lost millions
of dollars! -Do I get a chance -to talk?
-It wasn’t your fault! Come on, you coward!
Say the truth! -What do you mean, coward?
-You’re a coward! Damn, I… I don’t know if he should have
ever had a TV show, but I do know
he would have fit right in at an imaginary
black restaurant, I’ll tell you that much. He would have been perfect. “You’re the coward!
You’re the coward! Where’s my food? (bleep) it,
I’ll do it live!” (laughter, applause) So it’s sad to say, but
farewell, extremely old friend. But before you go,
Bill O’Reilly, one last time, please,
why don’t you play us out. -♪ ♪ -And they’re
just running around, trying to jazz people up. I give them the same jazz
I give everybody else. Did the sporting crew give him
any jazz on that? When you get back to New Haven,
are they gonna give you jazz? -…which I say… I say…
-Oh, I’m only giving you jazz. You know Trump, uh,
gives you jazz all day long. Jeb Bush give you a little…
little, uh, jazz today. -I know exactly who I work for.
-Are they giving you…? Get some jazz down here? You
getting some jazz down there? That’s all right.
I’m a big boy. You give me jazz every time
I see you. O’REILLY: No, no, please.
I’m interested… Obviously, I’ve given Reich
some jazz. Anybody give you any jazz? I’m giving you a little jazz
on the commies. Jazz. Jazz. Jazz. Jazz. Jazz. How about you–
do you get jazz? Gave her a little jazz, Mike. I gaveeverybodya little jazz. (piano plays discordant chord)