Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories: Rick James – Chappelle’s Show

Charlie Murphy’s True Hollywood Stories: Rick James – Chappelle’s Show


WE GONNA HANG OUT
WITH RICK JAMES TONIGHT, YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING? AND HERE HE COMES OUT THE ROOM,
WHEN I LOOK AT HIM– AND I’M NOT
BULLSHITTING YOU, MAN, I SEEN, LIKE, LIKE AN ORANGE–
HIS AURA OR WHATEVER, I SEEN IT. IT WAS ORANGE. – ♪ GIVE IT TO ME, BABY ♪ – ♪ GIVE IT TO ME, BABY ♪ – HE STARTED KICKING IT. AND HE WAS
MAD NIGGERISH, MAN, WHICH WAS, YOU KNOW,
RIGHT UP MY ALLEY. – I’M ONE OF THE BADDEST
MOTHERFUCKERS OF ALL TIME. I’M ONE OF
THE BEST SINGERS AND ONE OF THE BEST-LOOKIN’
MOTHERFUCKERS YOU’VE EVER SEEN. HOLD MY DRINK, BITCH. – HE’D WALK UP TO ANY CHICK AND LICK THE WHOLE SIDE
OF THEIR FACE, MAN. – I’M RICK JAMES, BITCH. ENJOY YOURSELF. [chuckling] – WE GOT CLOSER,
STARTED HANGING OUT. MY BROTHER DIDN’T DO
ANY OF THIS SHIT. SO AT NIGHT,
WHEN EDDIE WOULD BREAK OUT, WE WOULD ALL BE
GETTING CRAZY AND WILD. AND IF I WAS HANGING
WITH RICK, HE HAD THIS THING WITH ME WHERE HE USED TO ALWAYS,
LIKE, FUCK WITH ME, MAN. I DON’T KNOW
WHAT STARTED IT. – CHARLIE, HE WAS HANGING OUT
WITH THE BIG DOGS, YOU KNOW? CHARLIE, HE DIDN’T KNOW
HE WAS DOING CRAZY THINGS AND I HAD
TO STRAIGHTEN HIM OUT. SOMETIMES I HAD TO GO
UPSIDE HIS HEAD. – THINGS ESCALATED
TO THE POINT WHERE, YOU KNOW, MY MAN GOT TOO FAMILIAR AND I ENDED UP HAVING
TO WHIP HIS ASS, MAN, YOU KNOW, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, HE WOULD
STEP ACROSS THE LINE. HABITUALLY.
HE’S A HABITUAL LINE-STEPPER. THE FIRST TIME, YOU KNOW, I HAD TO END UP
WHIPPING HIS ASS, UH… WE WENT TO STUDIO 54. WE WALKIN’ UP
INTO THE VIP SECTION AND, UM, I’M LOOKING AROUND
TO SEE WHO’S THERE AND LOOKIN’ AT THE GIRLS
AND EVERYTHING. AND ALL OF A SUDDEN
I HEARD SOMEONE GO… – CHARLIE MURPHY! THAT WAS…
♪ COLD-BLOODED ♪ [laughs] – HE HAD THIS RING ON TO COMMEMORATE THIS SONG
HE HAD PUT OUT CALLEDUNITY.– AND THIS WAS IMPRINTED
IN THAT BLACK HEAD OF HIS FOR AT LEAST A WEEK. – ♪ UNITY ♪ – EDDIE AND EVERYBODY ELSE THOUGHT THAT THAT WAS
THE FUNNIEST SHIT. AND SO THAT THREW ME IN
A WEIRD SPACE, ‘CAUSE I’M LIKE,
YEAH, THIS IS RICK JAMES. HE’S A STAR. – I’M RICK JAMES, BITCH.
[laughs] THIS IS A CELEBRATION, BITCH.
[laughs] – MAYBE I’M OVERREACTING. I ACTUALLY WENT THERE, LIKE, “MAYBE I SHOULDN’T DO NOTHING,” BUT MY GHETTO SIDE WAS GOIN’, “YO, STOMP THIS MOTHERFUCKER
OUT RIGHT HERE. WHAT THE FUCK
IS WRONG WITH HIM?” – I DRUNK SOME WINE AND I’M JUST GETTING
STARTED, BITCHES. [laughing] – HE TOTALLY
JUST WROTE ME OFF. LIKE, I’M THAT NIGGA
TO STEAL ON, YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYIN’? – WHAT, HE’S GONNA SLAP ME BACK? I’M RICK JAMES.
HE’S CHARLIE MURPHY. – I WAITED, ‘CAUSE I KNEW
WHAT HOTEL HE WAS STAYIN’ IN. EDDIE AND THEM WENT HOME AND I SAID,
“YO, I’LL BE RIGHT BACK.” I SHOT OVER TO THE HOTEL,
WENT UP TO HIS ROOM, KNOCKED ON THE DOOR. – SO THEN HE COMES IN THERE. AND I SAID, “LOOK, BITCH,
I’M RICK JAMES.” SMACKED HIM.
[chuckling] OH, CHARLIE MURPHY! HE HAD HIS HEAD COCKED
TO THROW ANOTHER RIGHT HAND. WHEN HE WAS COMING FOR IT,
I JUST CAME–BLAOW! I CAUGHT HIM
WITH THE FRONT. – HE’LL TELL IT
LIKE HE GAVE ME SOME KIND OF BRUCE LEE
CROSSKICK OR SOMETHIN’. – I KICKED THE SHIT
OUT OF HIM, MAN. – [screams] [screams in slow motion] – THE WIND IS
KNOCKED OUT OF HIM. AND THEN HE SCREAMS OUT… – SECURITY! – THE ONE IN THE FRONT,
HE HAD CROOKED EYES AND SHIT. HIS ONE EYE WAS LOOKIN’ AT ME. THE OTHER ONE
WAS LOOKING AT RICK. RICK HAD EDGED OVER
BY THE WINDOW. – NOW, DARKNESS,
THE TABLES ARE TURNED. DO WITH HIM WHATEVER YOU LIKE. – YOU MOTHERFUCKERS
TAKE ONE MORE STEP, I’M KICKIN’ THIS NIGGA OUT
THE MOTHERFUCKIN’ WINDOW. – BOBBY, FREEZE! – YOU KNOW YOU WAS WRONG
FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME EARLIER. LOOK WHAT YOU DID
TO MY FACE. – I’M SORRY, CHARLIE MURPHY.
IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. I WAS HAVING TOO MUCH FUN. I’LL OFFER YOU A TRUCE. THE STICKIEST OF THE ICKY. YOU WANT TO SMOKE
WITH THE OLD BOY, RICK JAMES? – YO, MAN, MY FOREHEAD
IS BUMPIN’, MAN. – NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, I THINK I’M BLEEDING
INSIDE MY CHEST. BUT I GOT THE MEDICINE. BITCH, COME OVER HERE AND HAVE SEX
WITH CHARLIE MURPHY. I’M RICK JAMES, BITCH. – THAT WAS HOW
THAT PARTICULAR INCIDENT ENDED, BUT IT WASN’T THE LAST TIME
I HAD TO WHIP HIS ASS… WHIP HIS ASS…
WHIP HIS ASS. – DON’T YOU THINK
CHARLIE’S A LITTLE OLD TO BE TAKING KARATE? HE PROBABLY TAKIN’ IT
WITH THE LITTLE KIDS. – THE STUDIO 54 THING,
YOU KNOW, THAT BLEW OVER, YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING? BUT THEN, YOU KNOW,
HERE WE GO AGAIN. – COCAINE IS A HELL OF A DRUG. [chuckles] – RICK IS ENCOURAGING ME. YOU KNOW, HE SHOWS UP AT
MY BROTHER’S HOUSE FUCKED UP. – NICE PLACE, NIGGA. – SO HE HAD
THESE DIRTY COWBOY BOOTS ON. PUSHING US OUT OF THE WAY,
BARGED IN THE HOUSE. MY BROTHER HAD
THESE BRAND-NEW COUCHES. THEY WERE SUEDE, RIGHT? AND HE GETS ON THE COUCH
AND SAYS… – WHY DON’T I STRETCH OUT? [laughs] AND JUST STARTED GRINDING MUD
ALL INTO THE COUCH, MAN. – YEAH, I REMEMBER
GRINDING MY FEET INTO EDDIE’S COUCH. – YOU REMEMBER WHY YOU DID IT? – BECAUSE EDDIE
COULD BUY ANOTHER ONE. – FUCK YOUR COUCH, NIGGA. BUY ANOTHER ONE,
YOU RICH MOTHERFUCKER. FUCK YO’ COUCH, NIGGA! FUCK YO’ COUCH! DARKNESSES,
DARKNESSES… – ‘CAUSE OF MY COMPLEXION
HE USED TO CALL ME DARKNESS. HE CALLS ME
AND MY BROTHER DARKNESS. HE ALWAYS SAYS,
“DARKNESS BROTHERS.” SEE, THIS IS LONG BEFORE
WESLEY SNIPES. BACK THEN, WE WAS THE BLACKEST
NIGGAS ON THE PLANET ACCORDING TO RICK JAMES. – EDDIE–BOTH OF THEM WERE
BROTHER DARKNESS. TWIN BROTHER DARKNESS. – AND WE STANDING THERE,
LOOKING AT HIM, AND HE’S LOOKING RIGHT
IN OUR EYES AS HE GRINDS HIS MUD. – SEE, I NEVER JUST DID THINGS
JUST TO DO THEM. COME ON, I MEAN,
WHAT AM I GONNA DO? JUST, ALL OF A SUDDEN, JUST JUMP UP AND GRIND MY FEET
ON SOMEBODY’S COUCH LIKE IT’S, YOU KNOW,
SOMETHING TO DO? COME ON, I GOT A LITTLE
MORE SENSE THAN THAT. YEAH, I REMEMBER GRINDING
MY FEET ON EDDIE’S COUCH. [tape rewinding] SEE, I NEVER JUST DID THINGS
JUST TO DO THEM. COME ON, I MEAN,
WHAT AM I GONNA DO? JUST, ALL OF A SUDDEN, JUST JUMP UP AND GRIND MY FEET
ON SOMEBODY’S COUCH LIKE IT’S SOMETHING TO DO? COME ON, I GOT A LITTLE
MORE SENSE THAN THAT. YEAH, I REMEMBER GRINDING
MY FEET ON EDDIE’S COUCH. – BUT THEN IT WAS LIKE, “YOU KNOW WHAT?
LET’S HANDLE THIS.” WE WENT OVER THERE… – HEY, CHARLIE MURPHY! – AND WE HELD HIM DOWN, AND WE JUST WAILED ON HIS LEGS. – AAHHH! AAH, YOU DARKNESS… YOU BLACK, MIDNIGHT
EVIL MOTHERFUCKER! BLACK MAGIC, DARKNESS! YOU’RE ALL DARKNESS! YOU’RE FUCKIN’…
DELIRIOUS MOTHERFUCKER… AAH! YOU ARE COLD AS ICE. – BUT STILL, RICK JAMES, EVEN AFTER TAKING
A BEATING LIKE THAT… – FUCK YO’ COUCH, NIGGA. – THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S
GOIN’ OUT. HIS LEGS IS LIKE,
LIKE, LINGUINE. – I’VE BEEN KICKED OUT
OF BETTER HOMES THAN THIS! I’LL BE BACK,
YOU BLACK MOTHERFUCKERS! WIDE-NOSE-HAVIN’ MOTHERFUCKERS! THEY SHOULD’VE NEVER
GAVE YOU NIGGAS MONEY! YOU DON’T KNOW HOW
TO APPRECIATE SHIT! YOU KNOW YOU CAN
GET ANOTHER COUCH! WHAT AM I GONNA DO
ABOUT MY LEGS, EDDIE MURPHY! – MY BROTHER, YOU KNOW, HE’S A LOT MORE COMPASSIONATE
THAN I AM. HE’S LOOKING AND THE LIMO’S
DRIVIN’ OFF, AND HE SAID, “WOW, MAN,
RICK REALLY NEEDS HELP.” AND I WAS LIKE,
“YO, WE JUST GAVE HIM SOME HELP. “BUST HIS FUCKIN’ ASS AND SHIT. “I BET YOU
HE WON’T COME OVER HERE AND DISRESPECT
LIKE THAT AGAIN.” WRONG.
WRONG. WE’RE TALKIN’ ABOUT
RICK JAMES, MAN. – COCAINE’S A HELL OF A DRUG. [chuckles]

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  1. I love this skit!! literally one of the most memorable moments from Dave's show. NEEDS TO COME BACK AND MAKE MORE WITH CHARLIE

  2. I’m wondering why they keep reuploading this classic. Is Comedy Central still buthurt they couldn’t buy Dave Chappelle soul? Smh

  3. "We just gave him some help." That line kills me every time.
    Here is the third part, not great quality but just as funny. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVLuKbcxyRw

  4. I'm from Buffalo New York when is grease stories I've ever heard of Rick James on one of his grandchild was born
    Cigars in hundred dollar bills all the nurses on the floor Children's Hospital Buffalo New York rest in peace Rick James and Charlie Murphy

  5. I can see it now. Rick greeting Charlie in the afterlife!! 1:35 Charlie Murphy!!!!!

    Pure Gold!!! These skits never get old!!!!!
    RIP Rick and Charlie!!!!

  6. "See, I never just did things just to do them. Come on, what am I gonna do? Just all of a sudden jump up and grind my feet on somebody's couch like it's something to do? Come on. I got a little more sense then that.
    …Yeah, I remember grinding my feet on Eddie's couch."

    Saw this 15 years ago and it's still so incredibly funny, always was and always will be

  7. Darkness. This is a fuccing classic yo. Rick James was foine until that hardass life wrecked him. Rest in power Charlie and in peace RJ.

  8. It's funny because this doesn't make Rick James look bad at all it's just funny as fuck and it's like … he deserve His ass whooping and He's still bad ass … RIP Charlie and Rick .. we miss y'all

  9. Funny how he calls Charlie Murphy darkness.. 😂 best comedy skit ever made. Thank god Chappelle show was there to entertain me during my highschool days. Good times. 👍

  10. This shit was posted eight hours ago… Comedy Central sure can’t come up with good shit these days if this is what is their most resent post.

  11. I went to one of Charlie Murphy's last stand-up comedy performances, in Las Vegas, and had no clue he was sick. I wish I had audiotaped it. He was phenomenal!

  12. Nice to see an official version of this on YouTube. I've been watching bootleg clips for years whenever I need a laugh.

  13. Honestly, this is going to go hands down as one of the funniest, if not THE funniest, TV comedy sketch of all time. I remember quoting almost every single fucking line of this in high school with my friends, all the way up to early college. Too good.

    "They shouldn't have given you niggas money!!!." Classic.

  14. I remember when this shit first aired…I was middle school and I just remember dieing laughing, laughing Soo hard and the next day at school everyone got ng I'm Rick janes bitch….and being on the wrestling team what my buddy and I did as like pranks or hazing …we would hold the under classmen down and just wail on they're fcking legs

  15. That's cocaine is strong..it had Mitch Green fucking with Mike Tyson every chance he got..and Poor Rick James ..🤣🤣🤣

  16. Some of the funniest television ever made and that's all the comments you people can muster? I wish i had three hands so I could give you all three thumbs down.

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