Horror Short Film “The Bloody Ballad of Squirt Reynolds” | ALTER Exclusive

Horror Short Film “The Bloody Ballad of Squirt Reynolds” | ALTER Exclusive


We’re at Camp Nawgonamakit sitting round the fire pit. Shut your eyes, girl. It’s getting pretty spooky here. Well let me make this crystal clear. This is a cry for help. This is a cry for help. Now I’m going to tell you a story. The year was 1980. Camp Nawgonamakit opened. The first campers were learning arts and crafts and survival skills. There was one child that stood out among them. No one knew his real name. They just called him Squirt. Squirt? He sounds like a geek! Not only was he a geek. He was also horribly disfigured. That’s awful. The only thing worse was how the other children treated him. So he hid best he could. Now, if you were horribly disfigured in 1980 who’s face would you use to cover it up? Burt Reynolds, of course! Squirt wore a Burt Reynolds mask the entire summer. Only to take it off when he slept. But one night, while he slumbered in his bunk. A bunch of kids filled his mask with steaming hot honey glue. They woke Squirt up, telling him there was an emergency. As he frantically put on his mask, the one thing he thought could protect him burnt the skin right off his face. He ran into the woods and was never seen again. Cool story, Chet. Very original. So nobody knows what happened to him? Legend has it he took refuge in the abandoned camp fitness center. No one was ever going to call him Squirt Reynolds again. He would make sure of that. From then on, any campers unlucky enough to set eyes on him wouldn’t laugh. They would cry out in terror. If you close your eyes and listen carefully, they say you can hear the clanging of dumbbells as Squirt gets in a late night pump. Goddamnit Jeremy! Hey girl, you wanna work out with me? No. You could really use it, I’m working up a nice sweat. Why don’t you eat a dick. I don’t eat dicks. Seriously, Lana, come on? Just some good ole fashioned camp shenanigans. Lana! Fuck! I’m going to go check on her. Trey, are you smoking a doobie? It’s a doobie. I’ve been around the block. Are you okay? Yeah… now that you’re here. What was that? Nothing. No, I heard something. SQUIRT REYNOLDS?!? Zoe! Lana? Zoe, where’d you go? Zoe help! Lana I’m coming! What’s wrong Zoe? Hey!!! I was playing a song… Man. More of a guitar guy?

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  1. You can watch our exclusive interview with "The Bloody Ballad of Squirt Reynolds" and "When Susurrus Stirs" filmmaker Anthony Cousins here: https://youtu.be/OIDnHjmVO2s

  2. I’ve been watching these short videos In between watching Shameless or another Creeped Out or American Horror episode on Netflix.. I seem to always get a recommendation while I am watching these other stories about horrible yet funny situations 🤭

  3. Amaizing!! This was perfect comedy horror. One of my fav. Love you Alter and i know you Love me too💛💚

  4. Camp Notgonmakeit?This was hilarious. I LOLd when the girl with the glasses was just casually dropped on the ground front of the guys. 🤣

  5. Freddy Mercury will love to play the character mainly wearing that tight short jeans and T-shirt.
    I would definitely wear it too 🤔

  6. Also how do these make money? They really well produced wich takes alot of money. But I don't see the views.
    Also I fuckimg really liked this one. Old set up. campers. But idk seemed fresh bro

  7. I died when he said ' Squirt Reynols'…. I mean literally. This seems to be a cross between Jason/Camp Crystal, & Scooby Doo.

  8. Squirt Reynolds… I think there's room for you in the Altered world I live in.♥♥♥ But seriously.. when he used that girls voicebox to call out to her friend I nearly peed myself. Its all too unbelievably corny that it makes it funny.

  9. so bad it was brilliant. loved the guitar strings slicing the face, nice touch. please make into a full length movie.

  10. I didn't know if I could cut off somebody's throat,, and take it,,, well use it,, I could sound exactly like them,,, 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣

  11. Film begins at 18 seconds.
    By 22 seconds I wanted a killer to stomp the guitar and use one or more strings to garrote the singer!
    Just thought I'd mention that, before I watch the rest of the film.

    Edit: just watched it and Squirt done better with the strings than I could have hoped for…
    I love a happy ending!
    Lmao.

  12. Every single couple is HOMOSEXUAL in your films. Stop already we know you're so "woke" homiez!
    Btw total garbage again.

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