Jim Gaffigan on Traveling Internationally with Five Kids


>>Jimmy: HOW ARE YOU?>>SO NICE.>>Jimmy: HOW HAVE YOU BEEN?>>I’M GOOD.>>Jimmy: HOW HAS YOUR SUMMER GONE SO FAR?>>IT WAS TOO MUCH TIME WITH MY FAMILY. WAY TOO MUCH TIME. I TOOK MY KIDS TO EUROPE.>>Jimmy: UH-HUH. NICE.>>AND I TRIED TO GET RID OF THEM. I TOOK MY KIDS TO EUROPE, WHICH IS QUITE POSSIBLY THE MOST EXPENSIVE THING YOU COULD DO IN THE WORLD.>>Jimmy: OF COURSE. YOU’VE GOT A LOT OF KIDS, RIGHT?>>I’VE GOT A LOT OF KIDS. FIVE.>>Jimmy: FIVE KIDS.>>MOST PEOPLE ARE LIKE WHY?>>Jimmy: HOW MANY ROOMS DO YOU HAVE TO GET WITH FIVE KIDS? >>WE HAVE TO GET A COUPLE ROOMS, AND THEN WE HAVE TO GET A ROOM JUST FOR THE iPADS. WHERE IS GOING TO BE THE CHARGING STATION? IT’S VERY IMPORTANT.>>Jimmy: YEAH, AND THEN GOING TO EUROPE, YOU’VE GOT TO CONVERT.>>THERE’S GOT TO BE THE CONVERTER. IT’S VERY DRAMATIC. BUT IT’S EXCITING.>>Jimmy: WERE YOU WORKING, WERE YOU ON A COMEDY TOUR. WHERE DID YOU GO? WHAT COUNTRIES?>>I DID TWO SHOWS IN IRELAND. AND TWO IN SPAIN. AND PRAGUE AND BUDAPEST. AND IT WAS, IT WAS AMAZING, CAUSE, YOU KNOW, IT’S JUST A DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE. IN IRELAND, I LOVE IRELAND, BUT IT WAS LIKE 68 DEGREES, AND THEY WERE COMPLAINING WITH THE HEAT.>>Jimmy: OH, REALLY?>>OH, IT’S SO HOT. SO HOT. DO YOU WANT A FAN FOR YOUR ROOM? AND I’M LIKE, I’M WEARING A SWEATER. I THINK I’M OKAY. BUT I LOVED IT, AND, YOU KNOW, SPAIN, WHICH WAS UNBELIEVABLE. THAT’S WHERE I’M FROM, ORIGINALLY. AND, NO, SPAIN, WHICH OF COURSE IS, YOU KNOW, THEY CALL IT ESPANIA. I IT’S WEIRD WE CALL SOMEBODY ELSE’S COUNTRY A DIFFERENT NAME. I’M FROM ESPANIA, SPAIN, HUH? IT’S CALLED ESPANIA. I LIKE SPAIN BETTER. HI, MY NAME IS BOB. I THINK YOU’RE MORE OF A SAM.>>Jimmy: IN AMERICA, DO YOU FIND THAT YOU’RE BEING GREETED WARMLY BY PEOPLE IN OTHER COUNTRIES? >>I LOVE TRAVELING EDG INTERNATIONALLY. AND IT’S DIFFERENT WITH TRUMP AS PRESIDENT. IT’S KIND OF LIKE HAVING A PARENT WHO’S AN ALCOHOLIC. YOU SHOW UP IN A COUNTRY, AND YOU’RE LIKE, SORRY ABOUT MY DAD. WE DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT, BUT TRYING TO GET THE PHONE FROM HIM, BUT, WE DON’T KNOW.>>Jimmy: THIS IS, THESE ARE SOME PHOTOGRAPHS OF — >>YES.>>Jimmy: TELL US WHAT’S HAPPENING.>>THIS IS THE VERY FIRST TRIP I WENT ON, AND THIS IS ME. THAT’S NOT ME. THAT’S MY DAD. THIS IS ME AT IN FIVE YEARS. I LOOK AT PICTURES OF ME AS A CHILD, AND I MIGHT AS WELL BE LOOKING AT A STRANGER. I HAVE NO MEMORY. I DON’T KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON, I WAS OBVIOUSLY, THEY COULDN’T AFFORD SUNGLASSES FOR ME.>>Jimmy: SOMETHING WAS WRONG. THIS IS A GOOD ONE, TOO.>>THIS IS ME AND MY BROTHER JOE. AGAIN, I’M IN A HAT. IT’S ALMOST AS IF I WAS TRYING TO DRESS DORKILY. DO I HAVE SUSPENDERS ON?>>Jimmy: IT’S LIKE LOOKING AT A PICTURE OF A STRANGER AND YET YOU LOOK EXACTLY AS YOU DID. OTHER THAN THE GLASSES, YOU ARE YOUR OWN LITTLE TWIN.>>I’M BEAUTIFUL. I GUESS YOU COULD SAY IN A WAY, I’M BEAUTIFUL.>>Jimmy: AND WHAT’S THIS ARROW HERE BY YOUR BROTHER’S FACE?>>THAT IS A SCREEN GRAB I SUPPOSE.>>Jimmy: OH. [ LAUGHTER ] EVERYTHING TOP-NOTCH HERE.>>WHAT IS THIS THING. THAT’S A SCREEN GRAB.>>Jimmy: HOW MANY SIBLINGS DO YOU HAVE?>>I HAVE THREE BROTHERS AND TWO SISTERS. SO I’M FROM A BIG FAMILY. YOU’RE FROM A BIG FAMILY, RIGHT?>>Jimmy: NOT THAT BIG, MY BROTHER AND SISTER.>>MY WIFE’S ONE OF NINE KIDS, AND I LOVE MY IN-LAWS. DOES THAT SOUND UNBELIEVABLE? I DO LOVE THEM, IT’S JUST THERE’S SO MANY OF THEM. AND SO EVERY HOLIDAY, THERE’S NINE. SO EVERY HOLIDAY OR GET TOGETHER, ALL EIGHT OF THE SIBLINGS, INCLUDING MY WIFE AND THEIR FAMILY, GET TOGETHER AND SPEND EVERY MOMENT TOGETHER OVER CHRISTMAS. I WENT TO A MOVIE WITH 30 PEOPLE. I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THAT WAS LEGAL. WE’RE WALKING AROUND, PEOPLE THOUGHT WE WERE FROM A CHURCH. I MEAN, TO PUT IT IN PERSPECTIVE, JESUS ONLY WALKED AROUND WITH 12. I LEARNED VERY QUICKLY, I DON’T WANT TO DO ANYTHING WITH 30 PEOPLE, YOU KNOW, LIKE EVEN IF I WAS ON THE TITANIC AND THE LAST RESCUE BOAT WAS FILLED WITH 30 PEOPLE, I’D BE LIKE, YOU GUYS GO AHEAD. I DON’T WANT TO BE THERE WHEN YOU ARE TRYING TO DECIDE WHERE TO EAT LUNCH. AND OFTEN THERE IS MORE THAN 30 PEOPLE. BECAUSE SOMETIMES THOSE 30 PEOPLE INVITE OTHER PEOPLE AND I’LL HAVE CONVERSATIONS LIKE I’M YOUR WIFE’S UNCLE’S BEST FRIEND. OH, THERE’S A TERM FOR THAT. STRANGER. YOU’RE A TOTAL STRANGER.>>Jimmy: DO YOU GET ANYTIME FOR YOURSELF WITH THE KIDS AND THE IN-LAWS AND ALL THIS STUFF?>>I TRAVEL, I TRY TO TRAVEL AS MUCH WITH MY KIDS AS I CAN, BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE A LIVE ACTION VERSION OF “THE CAT’S IN THE CRADLE” SONG. AND THERE’S PLENTY OF TIMES, I’M NOT TRAVELING WITH MY KIDS NOW. WHEN I TRAVEL WITHOUT MY CHILDREN, IN BETWEEN THOSE MOMENTS OF GUILT ARE JUST HOURS OF HAPPINESS.>>Jimmy: OH, YEAH.>>AND NAPS AND DOING NOTHING. THAT’S WHAT I LIKE TO DO IS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. AND THEN I CALL HOME AND JUST HEAR THE CHAOS ON THE OTHER END. AND I HAVE TO LIE TO MY WIFE ABOUT WHAT I DID. SHE’S LIKE WHAT DID YOU DO TODAY? I GOT UP. DID THAT, ENOUGH ABOUT ME, WHAT ABOUT YOU?>>Jimmy: YEAH. TAKE A LITTLE NAP DURING THE COMMERCIAL BREAK HERE.>>I’M GOING TO DO IT.>>Jimmy: JIM GAFFIGAN’S WITH US.>>Jimmy: HI, WE’RE BACK WITH JIM GAFFIGAN. JIM IS THE AUTHOR AND PERFORMER ON THE FIRST, IS IT AMAZON’S FIRST COMEDY SPECIAL.>>THIS IS THE PEOPLE THAT, WHERE YOU BUY YOUR PAPER TOWELS ARE NOW PRODUCING COMEDY SPECIALS. SO I MEAN WE ALL, SOMEONE TOLD ME THAT, THEY ASKED ME, BUT WHAT IF YOU DON’T HAVE AN AMAZON PRIME ACCOUNT? AND I WAS LIKE, WELL, YOU PROBABLY AREN’T ON THE INTERNET, THEN.>>Jimmy: GET ONE IS THE ANSWER.>>MOSTLY, EVERYONE BUYS SOCKS AND, YOU KNOW, SOAP FROM AMAZON, SO I’M JUST HOPING THAT PEOPLE WILL SEARCH UP QUALITY TIME AND WATCH IT.>>Jimmy: YEAH, WHY WOULDN’T THEY WATCH IT. CERTAINLY, I MEAN IT’S YOU, AND YOU’RE SELLING IT ON A, NOW DID YOU MAKE A LOT OF THESE? BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE NOT THAT MANY PEOPLE ARE GOING TO BUY THIS.>>INTERESTINGLY, THAT’S A GOOD POINT. BUT INTERESTINGLY, LPs ARE GETTING BIGGER AND BIGGER.>>Jimmy: IT SEEMS THE SAME SIZE TO ME.>>YEAH, BUT IT IS.>>Jimmy: IT’S GONE FROM LIKE 1200 WEIRDOS WHO HAVE RECORD PLAYERS IN THEIR HOMES TO 1400.>>NOW, I THINK THEY’RE COMPETING WITH CDs AND EIGHT TRACK. THEY’RE COMPETING WITH EIGHT TRACK.>>Jimmy: WE’VE GOT SOME ANIMALS COMING OUT IN A MOMENT.>>I KNOW, I’M EXCITED.>>Jimmy: WHERE WERE YOU HERE?>>THIS IS IN KYOTO.>>Jimmy: IS ALL OF THESE YOUR KIDS OR IS THAT A MONKEY.>>THAT’S A MONKEY. SO IN KYOTO, ON A MOUNTAIN, THEY HAVE LIKE MONKEYS THAT YOU WALK UP. I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THAT THERE WERE MONKEYS IN KYOTO, SO YOU WALK UP THIS MOUNTAIN, AND THERE’S ALL THESE PRECAUTIONARY SIGNS, LIKE DON’T FEED THE MONKEYS. DON’T LOOK AT THE MONDAY KEY.>>Jimmy: I HAVE ONE OF THOSE SIGNS RIGHT HERE.>>AND THEN YOU GET UP THERE, AND THE MONKEYS ARE EVERYWHERE. SO THEN THEY’RE STANDING NEXT TO YOU, BUT YOU’VE BEEN TERRIFIED THAT THEY’RE GOING TO ATTACK YOU AND TEAR YOUR EYES OUT. AND THEN THEY HAVE THESE DIFFERENT ONES, THIS IS WHAT A MONKEY LOOKS LIKE WHEN IT’S ANGRY, AND THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE WHEN IT’S HAPPY, WHICH IS THE EXACT SAME APPEARANCE.>>Jimmy: LOOK, SAYS SCARY, AND SOMEBODY’S FIRING THESE ARROWS AT YOU AGAIN IN THE PICTURE.>>THAT’S A SCREEN GRAB, JIMMY.>>Jimmy: OKAY, I DIDN’T GET THAT RIGHT. WOULD YOU LIKE TO STAY FOR THE ANIMALS?>>HEY, I’M HUNGRY.>>Jimmy: JIM GAFFIGAN! “JIM GAFFIGAN: QUALITY TIME” IS AVAILABLE FRIDAY ON AMAZON PRIME VIDEO. WE’LL BE BACK WITH DAVE SALMONI AND WILD ANIMALS.

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