It is time to play
the Midnight Gameshow! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE This, of course, is the only game
where if you snooze… AUDIENCE: ..you lose! Quite right! So, let’s find out
who I woke up in the dead of night. He is TV’s favourite criminal
barrister, and, frankly, I’m lucky that I’m not behind bars for
breaking and entering into his home. Of course, I woke up Judge Rinder! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE I’ve got to come up, Rob.
I’m coming up. So, Rob, it’s very good
to see you again. Erm… Now… This is
a little bit awkward. So, I woke you up in the middle
of the night… Mm-hm. ..on the Midnight Gameshow. Would you like to share
your general feelings towards me? Erm… Well… It’s difficult to describe
my contempt and hatred for you. Because, unfortunately, a lot of
people enjoy the experience, but it did make you
a little bit enraged. I had no idea who you were
because I didn’t have my glasses on. That’s quite scary.
Yes. I thought, “What’s my auntie Adele
doing in my bedroom?” Is your auntie Adele
a very handsome, masculine woman? Very beautiful. So, tell me about when
you went to bed that night. Do you remember
the preceding evening? Yes. I’d been writing, and I’d
had a couple of glasses of Scotch and thought, “I really need to get
a good night’s sleep.” Yes. And I was dead, genuinely
dead to the world. You were. Really, I needed to get
a good night’s sleep because I had something
quite important to do next day. I’m sorry about that. We won’t
give it away, but, actually, some people came into your room that
you were incredibly excited to see. Oh, yeah, there was one moment.
There was one moment. But you were so happy.
I was happy at that point. But I thought
that I was in some very, very surreal Alice In Wonderland
dream. Yes. Erm… I kind of still do. No, this is…
I can understand that. Well, I have to say, you were
ultimately a great sport. Are you ready to watch it, Rob? It is brilliant. I just… I just want to get
an injunction, but…! If anyone can…!
APPLAUSE Ladies and gentlemen,
Judge Rinder’s Midnight Gameshow! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE KEYS JANGLE Shhh! GAME SHOW MUSIC PLAYS
Rob! HE CRIES OUT It’s the Midnight Gameshow! BANG! Whoohoo! Hi, Rob. Can you tell me
what’s going on?! Hi, Rob! How are you?
You’re a lunatic! I’m so sorry! Were you listening to
some kind of sleep app? No, no, Deep Space Nine
from Star Trek. Listen, I’m going to
ask you some questions… What are you talking about?! The first question is… It’s like my worst nightmare. It’s actually going to get
super-fun. OK. That’s good. You grew up, I believe,
in Southgate. Is that right? That’s right. And that is on
the Piccadilly Line. Yes. Can you name three Tube stations
on the Piccadilly Line? Er, Cockfosters –
hilariously – erm… Yeah, Cockfosters, Wood Green and Bounds Green. You are correct. You look very well…
in the middle of the night. I just woke up!
No, I know! So, how many jumpers is this jumper wearing?
MUSIC: Grandstand theme What’s wrong with you?!
Did you know about this? Of course I did! So, here we have Greg Rutherford,
Olympic champion. How many jumpers
is that jumper wearing? How many do you think? Seven jumpers. That’s so close! It’s ten.
Words can’t describe my hatred for you right now. It’s ten jumpers.
I’m sorry. OK. Thank you very much to Greg. OK,
we move on to the next game. Now, I’m so sorry to tell you, Rob, a well-known celebrity has
stolen an item from your home… Right. ..earlier today. I’m now going to call the defendant
accused of this crime for you to cross-examine. Now…do you recognise
the defendant? That is Sooty. Now, Sooty is accused of burglary, and his defence
lawyer is here with him today. SWEEP SQUEAKS So, Rob, all I need you to do
is to cross-examine the defendant, and Sooty and his defence lawyer
will answer either yes or no. And yes is…?
SHORT SQUEAK That’s yes. And no is…
LONGER SQUEAK OK. So, can you discover what it is
through your questioning? DRAMATIC MUSIC
Hello, Sooty. Did you steal one of my… Oh, yeah,
did you steal one of my books? No. Erm, have you nabbed a painting? No. It’s very late! It’s quarter to two in the morning.
That’s what I’ve got. Rob, Rob, a serious crime
has been committed. I think you need to get to
the bottom of this, otherwise… You’re an absolute lunatic.
You’re a lunatic. Did you take it from the kitchen? No. Was it from the study? Ah! Oh! It was in the study.
Was it a photograph? No. No.
Was it an award? No. I haven’t got
any of them, anyway. Is it an ornament? Yes.
Ooh! Ah! Is it a Russian doll,
by any chance? Oh, my…
And where is this Russian…? I thought… I was working there
before and I thought it had gone! And there it is! It’s very heavy.
Don’t drop it. Careful. Oh, no,
they’re having a fight over it! It’s really kicked off. Thank you very much,
Sooty and Sweep. OK, right, I’m going to now ask you to
put this blindfold onto your eyes. Why?
Well, all will be revealed. I thought I was in the middle
of a strange hallucination. That’s exactly how we planned it.
So pop your blindfold on. OK, now, I am going to ask you to identify the type of ball
that I place in your hands. OK? So, here comes your first ball. Who is giving me a ball?
Now, what kind of ball is that? Erm, that’s a rugby ball
or an American football. That is the correct answer!
You’re doing very well so far. But I don’t want to do well!
I want to go to sleep. Here’s your final ball. If you put your hands out
and feel the latest ball… What ball is it? Sorry… Wait, hang on. What? Is that…? That’s your head.
No. I can give you some clues… Oh, God, please…
..about this Ball. This Ball is 81 years old. It’s not Ed Balls, is it? No, this Ball is a 1980s
children’s television presenter. Oh, God. It can’t be Zoe Ball’s dad? How are you? That’s the correct answer! I’m sorry I woke you up. Go back to sleep. It’s Johnny Ball! HE STAMMERS You…You can’t…
This is not normal. That’s the idea!
Thank you very much. Johnny Ball, ladies and gentlemen!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE OK, it’s time to test you
on some classic TV theme tunes. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I’ll know
them. I’m going to give you the title of a show,
and all you have to do is remember the theme to that show.
We’ll start with an easy one. Go on. Dallas. Oh, yeah. Erm… HE HUMS THE THEME MICHAEL JOINS IN THEME PLAYS OK, next up. What theme tune
is associated with this person? Oh, my God, it’s Zammo McGuire!
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
It’s just the best thing ever! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
That’s the best thing ever! That’s an amazing moment,
ladies and gentlemen. How are you? I’m really good,
thank you. It’s Lee MacDonald! Yes. This is Zammo McGuire! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
Sorry. Sorry. That’s the best… Oh, my God! Just Say No!
This is Zammo McGuire! Just Say No! I swear on my life,
this is the most… # Just say no! # # Just be a hero
Be who you are… # You did boxing and…?
Yeah, I did. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You were born in 1968, I think.
What?! Yeah, yeah, he was born on the 21st of June 1968. I used to get the annuals. Yeah. And you were my favourite. I used to get the annuals. This is unbelievable. Mrs McClusky… You got the annuals! You know
his birthday! Roland Browning! Erkan Mustafa!
He saved me, yeah, yeah. It’s Grange… Whoever…
Do you know what? I don’t hate you any more. I actually… This is the most
exciting… I’m your biggest fan. I know this is an incredible moment, but of all the game shows
in history, no-one has ever answered a question by filling in
ALL the other information. I’m genuinely… The question was,
“What is the theme tune?” It’s Grange Hill. HE HUMS THE THEME THEY JOIN IN THEME TUNE PLAYS Sorry, do you have to go?
No, no, everyone’s staying. Are you going to get into bed
with me? Oh, not in that way! Just to sleep! Go on, then, you get in bed.
It’s a big bed. We’re going to build the bed up.
Johnny? Johnny’s coming back. And Greg’s come in. Come on, Greg,
squeeze in there. Johnny’s in. All right. Now,
behind your window… Are you going to clean that? Well, it will be cleaned
by a mystery window cleaner. All I need you to do
is answer the following questions, and a little bit will be revealed. So, if you can answer
the following pop-based questions… There’s no chance
I’ll get any of these right. Which ’90s pop group
had their seventh number one with a track titled Never Forget? Uh, that was Take That. That’s the correct answer. And look,
oh, my God, there’s actually a person there. What can you see?
I can see it looks like it’s a woman and she’s wearing
something very nice. What?! What? You’re cleaning my
windows in the middle of the night! What’s wrong with you?!
Next question. Which Jamaican rapper released Boombastic
in 1990…? Mr Boombastic. Yes.
I don’t know. Shaggy. That’s the correct answer.
Well done. Who is it?
That’s what I’m asking you. I don’t know, because…
OK. Which group released the single
Barbie Girl in 1997? # I’m a Barbie girl
In a… # I-I… Why would I know that? I don’t listen to anything
that happened after 1899. Aqua. That’s the correct answer! GEORGE FORMBY:
# When I’m cleaning windows! # What? What? Who’s that? It’s Louise!
It is! Come on, Louise! In you come!
I… Oh, my gosh! Thank you very much, and good night! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE I’m here! In your bed. Oh, Louise, I love you, but
could you swap with Greg, please? CHEERING AND APPLAUSE No! TOO fun! Do you still hate me?
No! That was fun, right? No. Yes or no? No. No, I mean,
Zammo McGuire was exciting. Tell me about
what on earth’s going on. Were you obsessed with Grange Hill?
Yeah, I was a mad Grange Hill fan. And you’ve got
this incredible memory. You knew his birthday
and everything about him. Yes. And did you see the moment
where he got quite creeped out and wanted to…?
The whole idea was to surprise you, and he just literally, like,
“Get me out of this.” Completely freaked out
by the whole thing! He thought I was a stalker!
Yeah! It’s very rare that people
actually break into the homes of their own stalkers. It was an incredibly unfortunate
turn of events. It happens to me all the time,
because I remember, you know, things about people. I’ll never be
able to forget this, for example. You thought Ed Balls
was in his 80s. I don’t know, that time of night, it’s difficult to discern
between Balls. Difficult. Well, listen, you were
an absolutely amazing sport. Before you go, we have
actually made for you a… Well, a court artist has drawn
this lovely piece. So, this is a court artist. This is something
for you to have on a wall. That is you, that is Sooty
and Sweep. Look at that! That is a lovely moment. So you must
treasure that. And, of course, nobody who plays
the Midnight Gameshow goes away without their iconic
“Do not disturb” sign to ensure this will never, ever
happen again to you. Ladies and gentlemen, the wonderful Judge Rinder!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE