Movie Theater Etiquette

Movie Theater Etiquette

Welcome to the Glove and Boots Movie Review! Let’s take a look back at the best films we saw this year, shall we? I saw nothing. I got kicked out of, like, 8 movie theaters last month alone! Ugh… That’s ‘cuz you don’t behave right in the movie theaters! What? I just act how I act when I watch movies at home! I take off my pants, I get some chicken, and I yell at the screen! (munching) Are you good or bad, Magneto? MAKE UP YOUR MIND! HUSH! Going to the movies is great! But you’re not the only one in the movie theater. Unless the movie is really, really bad. So, have respect for your fellow movie patrons, and everyone will have a good time! You’re probably thinking, ‘I know this rule, this is common sense!’ ‘Then, why do they still have to show this before every film?’ (upbeat ragtime music) Sit down, Mario! But I have to pee! The one time you’re actually allowed to talk, is when you miss a part of the movie, ‘cuz you went to the bathroom. What did I miss? (whispering) This happens to all of us, so we sympathize, and we know not to talk when the film starts. But don’t ask like this: WHAT DID I MISS?! And… don’t ask a stranger instead of your friend. Hey buddy, I was making number two. What did I miss? Hush! Fine. Be a jerk. Hey buddy, I was making number two. What did I miss? (growls) Absolutely no cell phones. This includes texting. ‘Cuz when you text… (phones vibrate) (everyone looks down at their phones) Meh! And then you have to do this: ‘Hey! Fafa! I was texting instead of paying attention.’ ‘What did I miss?’ Seriously? Shh! Not all movies start at the same time. The reboot of Beastmaster you’re seein’, may start in five minutes. But everybody else may be going to see ‘The Start of the Dawn of… …the Return to the Planet of… …the Apes of Tomorrow’, and that starts in a half hour. So make sure you know what you want, and you have your money ready. It’s not that hard; they only sell, like, five things. Screw this! I’m sneaking in my own snacks next time. Hmmmm… There’s nothing wrong with sneaking in snacks when you go to the movie theater. Especially since a small soda costs, like, $7.50. But open sneaky snacks at the appropriate time. (emotional scene) (hiss!) Hush! And that’s not the most annoying sound in the movies! Wah! Babies. Everybody loves babies. Everybody loves the movies. Nobody likes babies at the movies! Even if your lil’ bundle a’ joy only cries once, WAAAHHH! (patrons groaning) You’ve ruined the movie for all of us. If your infant can’t support the weight of his own head, he’s not gonna get ANYTHING out of Guardians of the Galaxy. Hey! At least he’s not blocking my view! If you are a tall person at the movies, you are more hated than the fact that popcorn costs 70 bucks. (I hate you, giraffe) If you know you’re tall, Please slouch down a little. Or at the very least, don’t sit down directly in front of, like, a little girl or something. Did he just call me a little girl? Unfortunately, your seat and the seat next to you share an armrest. You are going to have to have an armrest competition with the person next to you if you want it. Follow the same rules you would on an airplane. If your neighbor’s arm gets there first, it’s theirs. If they move it, please follow the five-second rule! Give your neighbor a courteous count to five to reclaim his property. Meh… Follow these common courtesies, and you, and everyone around you will have a great time at the movies! That’s right! Unless that movie has Will Smith’s kid in it! That kid needs acting lessons… Yeah, he’s not very good… Bleh…

Only registered users can comment.

  1. If your baby cries you'll destroy the movie for all of us. If people can't support their own way during the movie your baby will not get anything out of beauty and the beast

  2. 1:00 This doesn't happen to me, because I understand how to go before the movie, and how to hold it. But sadly this means I'm stuck getting asked, "what'd I miss?"

  3. (Behind the scene)
    Mario: hey buddy, I was making number 2. What did I miss
    Monster: Breathing ……not much, The joker showed up for a bit but left.

  4. "Please don't talk during the movie.
    Please, please don't.
    You should know this by know.
    What's wrong with you?"

    For any of those who are still noisy in the theater.

  5. When me and my Mom sneaks snacks in the movies, we go to Walgreens to get candy and soda, mom tells me to put the candy and drinks inside her purse, once were inside the theater, mom takes out the candy and drinks, and we eat until the movie is over, and we never get caught, + if the employees at the movie theater catches us sneaking candy and drinks inside the movie theater, we get charged for it.

  6. in the UK if you take off your pants your ding dong will show and you will be lonely….. Be nice to the fellow brits

  7. When I Go To The Movies I'd Rather Bring Some Red Or Green Grapes, And Some Sparkling Water! Because When The Movie Is Over I'd Rather Get Some Food From Either The Restaurants Like Dairy Queen Or From The Supermarket Like Morton Williams When I Either Get Off The Bus If I'm In The Bronx, Or If I Get Off The Train From Manhattan! And I'd Prefer to be in the 5th Car!

  8. Oh god I hate jack black. He made goosebumps that gave me nightmares as a kid when I read them. Also can I have some chicken mario?

  9. I don’t go to the bathroom during the movie anymore. I either hold it until the movie’s over or go before the movie starts.

  10. Basically the basics of "how to behave in a movie theater" which are easy as they can be and still so hard to follow for some :/

    I would like to add a few more points that I struggle with and I'm sure others do, too:
    – No matter if you are male or female: Please make sure you don't wear your hear in a way that it blocks the sight for the person behind you. Prime example: wearing your hair as a bun. Guys also do this since the hipster style got more and more popular.
    – "No talking" already says it. But also: if you have seen the movie already, don't spoil the movie for others like talking about what's gonna happen next. Latter also goes when you have NOT seen the movie and loudly take a guess what's gonna happen next ("Now he's gonna die, right?")
    – Stop stomping into the seat in front of you

  11. Ah, the Avengers Infinity War PSA.
    3:13 This did actually happen at my showing of Guardians of the Galaxy 1.

  12. Movies featured in this video (Note: I haven't guessed all of them yet):
    One of the "X-Men" movies
    "Back to the Future: Part II"
    "Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior"
    "Troll 2"

  13. Another add on to snacks, please make sure you don't chew like a cow. I want to hear the movie not food sloshing in your mouth.

  14. Eating five pounds of cucumber salad (cucumber / vinegar / onion / sour cream) prior to wedging through rows of knees and chair backs, leaving the entire theater smelling of decomposing sauerbraten and fancy feast filet & patte' is most probably poor theater etiquette.

  15. The "Don't bring a baby" is my #1 gripe! Some selfish moron decides even if he can't get a sitter, by God, he's bringing his filthy, screaming seedling!

  16. That makes Me laugh so hard I just yelled at the movie theater and I wanted to go to the bathroom and I will miss it

  17. People are going to laugh at me for this, but you'll should mention that people need to STOP BRINGING UNDERAGED CHILDREN TO RESTRICTED MOVIES.

    I went to see "Deadpool" back in 2016, and at least 3 different families brought their young children with them, even though it was clearly a Restricted movie.
    It was ridiculous.
    I enjoyed "Deadpool", and most of the kids were surprisingly well-behaved, but still.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *