(CITY NOISE) [Acoustic guitar music plays] [Acoustic guitar music continues] (PEOPLE TALKING) [Acoustic guitar music becomes more upbeat] [Upbeat acoustic guitar music continues] [Acoustic guitar music begins to fade] (FOOTSTEPS) TES: Hi, I’m gonna sit with you for just a minute. JANE: Okay… JANE: Can I ask why? TES: I’m avoiding someone. JANE: Who are you avoiding? TES: These two asshats from Lou’s. JANE: Oh…and um, why are you avoiding these…asshats? (TES LAUGHS) TES: I threw my drink on one of them. He insisted I take it and I insisted that I don’t take vodka cranberries from brainless frat scum. JANE: I’ve never had one of those before but, a free drink doesn’t sound that bad. TES: Yeah. Well, let’s just say handsy douche bags aren’t my type. JANE: And…what exactly is your type? TES: Well, since you asked Nancy Drew… I’d have to say it’s the straightedge loner chick who spends her Saturday nights reading feminist literature alone in the dark (FLICKS LIGHTER) TES: Obviously. JANE: Well, you’re out of luck…I hate leather. TES: Please tell me you’re not a vegan. Because that’s an already bigger cliche than this Manic Pixie dream girl vibe you’ve already got going for ya. JANE: For your information, this is a hot chocolate. TES: Hot chocolate?! Wow, I underestimated you. You are a badass (FLICKS LIGHTER) after all. TES: Oh shit, it’s them! Act natural. [Piano music plays] TES: You know, that was my favorite book in high school. (LIGHTER FLICK) TES: Have you had your awakening yet? [Piano music continues] TES: So Nancy… They gone? JANE: Yeah, yeah. Coast is clear. They went the other way. [Piano music fades out] (CITY NOISE FADES IN) JANE: So, what are those guys gonna do when they find you? TES: I don’t know. They probably want me to pay the dry-cleaning bill or something. JANE: I think that’s a reasonable request. TES: Yeah, not for me. I’m broke. TES: Well…thanks for the cover. (FLICKS LIGHTER) TES: Catch ya later, Nancy. (FOOTSTEPS) [Acoustic guitar music plays] [Acoustic guitar music continues] [Acoustic guitar music begins to fade] (LIGHTER FLICKS) (CITY NOISE) (TES LAUGHS) TES: You’re quite the detective, Nancy. JANE: It’s, uh, Jane actually. TES: Wow, couldn’t choose a better fitting name for the aesthetic. JANE: What’s that supposed to mean? Let me guess, your name is something hip and edgy like… Ruby or Pandora No wait, Axl! TES: I’m flattered believe me. It’s Tes, but I might just have to change it. Axl has a nice ring to it. (TES LAUGHS) (MENS’ VOICES APPROACHING) (MEN APPROACHING) FRAT GUY 1: I spent $75 on this shirt and she just throws a drink in my face, man. It’s messed up, dude.
FRAT GUY 2: Fuck her, man. Fuck her. Seriously. FRAT GUY 1: Yo, yo. What’s going on here? Who’s this?
FRAT GUY 2: Yo, maybe she’s seen her. FRAT GUY 2: Hey, did you see a girl in a leather jacket around here? JANE: Oh, yeah Axl? Someone said she caused a scene down at Lou’s…typical. JANE: You must be the victim? FRAT GUY 1: Yeah, stupid bitch ruined my brand-new polo. FRAT GUY 2: So, have you seen her or what? JANE: Uh, yeah, she went across the street to Cha-Cha’s. FRAT GUY 1: Dude, let’s go. FRAT GUY 1: She owes me a new shirt. She’s paying for this and like 5 rails. (VOICES FADE) [Piano music with wooing girls plays] TES: Have to hand it to you, Nancy, that was bad ass. TES: Alright, alright – JANE. That was pretty cool. TES: So, you’ve never had a vodka cranberry? Well in that case, I’ll make it a double. (JANE LAUGHS) JANE: Just as long as you promise not to throw it on me. (LIGHTER FLICK) TES: I promise. [Piano music with wooing girls continues]