Wives of 7 Cheating Husbands Get Candid | The Oprah Winfrey Show | Oprah Winfrey Network

Wives of 7 Cheating Husbands Get Candid | The Oprah Winfrey Show | Oprah Winfrey Network

We just heard a roomful
of cheating husband speak very candidly. And while you’ve been
watching this conversation, explicit conversation,
so have their wives. So Natalie is Stephen’s
wife of nine years. Danine is married to Ryan. Anne is married to Brian. Mary’s husband is Chris. And Amy is married to John. And Candy has been with
Mike now for seven years. And Terrence, whose
wife stayed home. First of all,
hearing your husbands speak so candidly
made you think what? Natalie? That was the first
time I ever heard him express the emotion about
how hard that was for him. OPRAH WINFREY: Really? Yeah, I had never
heard him verbalize that. And was that one of the
hardest days for you ever? By far. Now, Danine, Ryan told
us how smart you were, and that he thought at one
point that you were two steps ahead of him all the time. Did you feel like you were
playing detective with him? Yes, I did. OPRAH WINFREY: And said to
him, that’s no way to live. I actually work
as an investigator. So– [LAUGHTER] I
don’t miss much. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah. I don’t miss a step. And his cheating turned
you into a crazy person, I heard you say? I felt like I was
running around in circles and I felt like I
was losing my mind. You actually caught him
in an apartment, but did you not, cheating?
– Yes. Yeah? Right after we got married. Yeah, you did. It’s awful because you
get obsessed with looking, and digging, and searching. And then once you’re
right, it just motivates you to keep
looking, and keep digging, and keep searching. And there’s no end to it. OPRAH WINFREY: Uh-huh. Now, Amy, how are you today? Because you just found out when? I– it was one of those
days I’ll have in my head like my kid’s birthdays, January 13. OPRAH WINFREY: This year? Yes. OPRAH WINFREY: But
what you found out was about an affair
that had happened– Five years ago. Why is this affair that
happened five years ago– AMY: Worse that– –so devastating to you? This one was a
lot more involved. OPRAH WINFREY: Uh-huh. When I first found
out, he in a way tried to make me feel bad. He said oh, it was nothing. I read the emails
after I found them. He was upstairs with the kids. I stormed out of the house,
went for a walk, came back. And when I came back, he
said, I know why you’re upset. And it’s nothing. It’s no big deal,
that kind of speech. And I said, you’ve
got to be kidding me. I was like, you don’t see– OK, let me stop you there. He has said to us that he had
no sex with any of these people. He says he didn’t. But I’m not sure if I’m still
willing to believe that. Because I’ve read the emails. Uh-huh. OPRAH WINFREY: Did the emails
indicate some sex happened? They indicated that
something physical happened. OPRAH WINFREY: OK. Whether it was touching
or something else, I– whenever I ask him, it’s
the “I don’t remember” card. It’s the– John’s crying. John, why are you crying? It’s only been
since I’ve been coming to terms all this that I– I just– I’m
realizing how much– how much I really love my
wife, and how much I want to– I’ll tell you, let me
tell you something to save yourself a little bit here. You’ve got to tell the truth. You’ve got to tell– [APPLAUSE] You know what? All of these tears
don’t mean a damn thing. They don’t mean anything at all. They mean nothing. [APPLAUSE] They mean absolutely nothing. And you know what? I don’t want you telling
me and this audience– you need to go home and strip
yourself clean with the truth to her. Because you– [APPLAUSE] –you only deserve to
be forgiven if you can acknowledge what you have done. And you are still playing with
her, and playing with yourself, and playing with
the relationship, and playing with your
children because you’re not willing to strip
yourself clean. And the healing can’t start
until you start with the truth. Am I not right here? That is the truth. [APPLAUSE] So I don’t want you telling
us anything you haven’t already shared with her. Because that should be
your private business. And she should not
have to hear whatever it is in front of all of us. But that would be
the victory for you. And the reason for
this whole, you know, TV thing, if you would
have the courage to do that, to step up and be a real man– be a real man and
tell her the truth. And then let whatever
happens happen. [APPLAUSE] You know, Mary, I
was feeling for you because the person he
was having an affair with was brought into the home. Correct. That, to me, is just– that
kind of is searing to me, it’s searing. So Chris, when you told
Mary that we were here, and we were in
this house, what– Well a, lot of
things were brought up. And I was a raving maniac. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah, when
you saw your husband, your husband was very emotional. Correct. And that made you feel what? That, you know,
he still cares. He still cares. He loves me. I love him. And we’re going to work it out. OPRAH WINFREY: Is that right? [APPLAUSE] Yeah. And now, Anne, did you
confront the other woman? Yes, I did. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah? Yeah, I– [APPLAUSE] It was really quite
the experience. Because when I first found
out, I was completely shocked. I felt I had been living
the Cinderella life. And in one moment,
my marriage was over. Because didn’t sense anything? I had no idea. I sensed nothing at all. OPRAH WINFREY: He came
to you and told you? Yeah, it was a complete shock. And actually, it was
like I was losing my sanity in that moment. OPRAH WINFREY: Right. And I remember even thinking
about killing her and then kind of coming to and
going, oh my gosh, I can’t believe I’m even capable
of having a thought like that, and immediately
bringing it into check, and actually having
to work through, and think about forgiving. And then I thought,
it can’t remain a mystery to me for
the rest of my life what this woman is like. But I wanted to see what was
this woman like that could come in after 18 years of
marriage and steal the affections of my husband. And I was really quite amazed
in that meeting with her. I mean, among other things,
I was kind of like, her? I was expecting a sex goddess. You know? And she wasn’t what
I had envisioned. So it was good for
me to see that. And– Actually, may
I just stop here? I think that was one of the best
points made of our conversation with the men. Because everybody
thinks it’s going to be a sex goddess,
or somebody who’s going to look better than me. And it’s funny you say that. Because she keeps
saying her, her, her. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah.
– Her, her. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah. She didn’t mention
one time him. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah.
– You know? And this is what a
lot of women do who are married to men such as– like what we have done.
not that we’re bad men. We just did a bad thing. They blame the woman more
than they blame the man. [APPLAUSE]
OPRAH WINFREY: Yep. We manipulate the situation
for her to blame the woman. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah. I think Terrence’s point
is very well-taken. It’s your husband out cheating,
and you didn’t go for him. Yeah, you know what? I thought about that a lot. And I’m far enough now
that I know the reason why is because I loved my husband. Exactly. So it was easy to direct
all my anger and all my pain towards a stranger and an
enemy that I didn’t know. Because I couldn’t make the
mental transition of seeing the man that I loved and
adored as my enemy in a second just like that. Wow, that’s really brilliant. Candy, did anything
Mike say reveal anything to you in that interview? How did you feel watching him? He wasn’t totally honest.
OPRAH WINFREY: He wasn’t honest. OK. And it’s disheartening. It’s disheartening. OPRAH WINFREY:
It’s disheartening. Yeah, to see. Do you agree with
what I was saying earlier, that until you’re
honest, there’s nothing? Oh, I totally agree. And I’ve told him that. OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah, so
what are you going to do? I’m not quite sure
what I’m going to do. There’s been second,
and third, and fourth– how many times can
one person find it within themselves to forgive? OPRAH WINFREY: Yeah. My response to that is if
I’ve already destroyed the trust and the faith that she
had in the beginning, anything that I say
nowadays just doesn’t– it doesn’t hold any water. They’re words. – There’s nothing.
– They’re words. And what is there–
what is there to– OPRAH WINFREY: Would you
say– would you agree with me? Would you agree–
I don’t whether you agree or don’t agree. But have you stripped
yourself naked, down to the– I’ve told her everything
that ever happened. OPRAH WINFREY: You
told her everything? I just recently
found out Saturday– OPRAH WINFREY: Something else? –that it’s continued. Yes.
[GROANS] So– OK, well, this is going to
be one hell of an after-show. I can’t wait. [LAUGHTER]

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  1. It ain't no way Im sitting up there holding this man's hand in his shame. Trust Me… we would both be up there telling our cheating stories. Sometimes men need to know what it feels like when someone else hit your cookie.

  2. John: I’m so emotional because I just realized how much I love my wife. Sniff, sniff!
    Real John: God please don’t let me have to live in a crappy apartment and pay alimony and child support!!

  3. Why are we treating cheating as a uncontrollable medical diagnosis? It was ALL CONTROLLABLE by the cheater…..BYE

  4. It's amazing to me how men show women who they are and women baby them through the process. The bullshittery😂🤣🤦🏿‍♀️

  5. All the men have to do is tell the truth
    .. I mean what's the worst that could happen? The women stay…no way…cant be so🤣😂

  6. Smartness is important in marriage and in a relationship and I’m glad that cyberhackinggenius helped cloned my husband’s phone. I got access to all his dealings both on phone and social media without touching his phone. All I did was share my husband’s phone number with Cyberhackinggenius and I was able to read both his new and deleted messages from my phone without having to touch his phone. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad to find out all his secrets and infidelity with the help of cyberhackinggenius. I’m here in UK and able to access my husband’s phone messages with a link on my phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. I got to discover that my husband who is legally married to me here in UK is also recently married to another woman in Canada and I’m finally going through a divorce with lots of evidence against him. I read all deleted and recent chats on his Whatsapp, Twitter,Facebook,Instagram messages and Skype. You can contact this great hacker “Gavin” via Gmail  (cyberhackinggenius) or text and speak to him directly on his phone and WhatsApp : +19256795146 and I hope you find peace with your heart after finding the truth.

  7. what the hell kinda world do we live in where men are being held accountable for their cheating. .. if this is marriage then i dont want it, seems boring and i actually have to answer when my name is called? smdh hell nah

  8. Hope these women know that the next rough patch that comes along he'll be going back to his old ways. There will never be trust in their relationship because you know what he's capable of.

  9. 7:24 "Not saying we're bad men, we just did a bad thing." Cheating is a matter of character and morals, a good person would work it out, seperate or get a divorce rather than cheat on their partner. So yes, you are a bad man, I cannot think of a worse thing to do to someone you love than to cheat on them with another person.

  10. How are they with these losers omg he loves you no he doesn’t risk the pain he is causing they are careless with these women and how they stay idk

  11. So sad how these women feel they need to accept what these men have done. They are selfish narcissists. They don’t care about there wives at all. I bet the majority of them have done it again by now. I’d rather be alone then stay with a man that betrayed me. How can you heal from that. I’d never fully trust again.

  12. All I can say is men now in days say women file for divorce more than ever . Well being that women can provide their own resources . No reason or benefits to stay with a cheating man . Love isn't enough to live with constant distrust . Especially if you are educated and can provide for yourself .

  13. The sad part is these men look like they don't care and they look miserable. Smh they just need to let their men cheat in peace if they are going to stick around.

  14. Women who are cheated on don't understand is once that trust is broken no amount of therapy can repair it. You'll never truly trust him again. You'll always be stressing about where he is and what he's doing. It's not worth it. Save yourself and leave.

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